May 7th 2023, 19:46:42
I am ending The Resistance and I am leaving the game.
I know I know, ya'll probably don't care. That's cool. And I know I'm not special enough to be deserving of a post on these forums. My existence here was a small blip in the history of EE. I simply like closure, and this is that closure.
First I want to say congrats to Darkness/Mercs for defeating us. You guys have a strong team, dedicated and skilled, obviously. We never really stood a chance, although I am happy my team got to taste a small bit of victory in alliance last set. That set we had in team with Coalie under cover with us was quite fun. Even though we died a ton, we started to have success with legitimate kill runs, and that is when my understanding of the game really exploded I think. Coalie, thank you for that initial help and support. Likewise, Gerdler, you were fundamental in teaching me many things in this game. Thank you for allowing me to tag along in LaF and learn from all of you. You got a great crew of people that were a lot of fun to play alongside.
DD - Even though you did tell me to never talk to you again, I'm going to break that promise. You were a standup guy helping me initially get a warbot setup and teaching me how to use those GHQ websites. Thank you for taking the time to do that. Please know I did try to keep our personal feelings about each other separate than our political stances toward each other. Probably failed at that, but it wasn't my intention.
Second, I want to apologize for the rhetoric getting out of hand. Truth be told, that's part of the reason for me leaving. It's not fun. My initial intention was to be bombastic and create 'drama', but fake, drama that gives people something to do. I didn't mind being the villain. I knew my claims were ridiculous. That was the point. I think, to an extent, it was successful. Ya'll really hated me, at the end, I think truthfully. The part where I messed up is I let myself perceive comments toward me as something they maybe weren't intended to be. I don't know where the shift happened from trolling and fluff talking to we legitimately hate each other and want to ruin each others experience, but I regret my part I played in that. It isn't fun, and it ruined the enjoyment of the game for me, and I would imagine ruins it for others as well. So for that I apologize.
I could go through person by person and talk about each of you. What I did wrong in our conversations, how I wish I would have reacted differently. I could thank many of you for the friendships we've created. But if I did that, Requiem would quite literally murder me. I also run the risk of no one reading this (probably well past that point already, though). On the topic of long posts, I am sorry those were such a problem for many. I genuinely tried to bring high effort content that gave people something to talk about, something to engage with. Not sure how I missed the mark so bad on that content, but it was clear I wasn't bringing anything of value to the community with those posts.
Lastly I should thank The Resistance players. They really were a tough group of guys. Ted, Milk, President, Bobby, Not Today, Albans, Taco, Smokey. At our peak we probably had about 10 guys. I really appreciate you all throwing your countries at a lost cause over and over. And I appreciate you all helping me try to recruit on reddit and in real life. We definitely gave a good effort I think, but ultimately, I think Symba said it many months ago 'losing over and over gets old'. I guess our clan is following a predictable path of having a lot of energy, but ultimately just getting smashed and leaving. You all did say it would happen. I was hoping I could avoid it, but I wasn't a good enough leader.
Ultimately though, I just wanted to apologize as well as say thanks. It was fun for a period of time. But it's become not fun for me, and it's just a game. If something isn't fun, it seems silly to continue to play.
I wish you all the best of luck.