It has been many great months since we have corresponded on these forums. I hope all is well!

Are you still going to merge with LaF?

REQUIEM!

THE EUGLAF DIVISION IS STILL READY AND EAGER TO TAKE ON NEW MEMBERS, AND I AM STILL LEADING IT! SOME OTHERS ON THE COMMITTEE SUGGESTED CLOSING DOWN THIS DIVISION, AS IT HAS BEEN ALMOST A YEAR AND STILL ONLY HAS ONE MEMBER.

I THEN POINTED OUT THAT OUR OTHER FOUR DIVISIONS ALSO HAVE ONLY ONE MEMBER. THIS QUICKLY SQUASHED ANY DEBATE!

DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GARDENING? I PLANTED SUMMER SQUASH MANY MONTHS AGO! THE PLANTS GREW QUITE WELL, BUT HAVE YET TO PRODUCE ANY PRODUCE. THEY HAVE HAD GIGANTIC FLOWERS FOR WELL OVER A MONTH NOW, BUT STILL THERE IS NO SQUASH. THIS IS INFURIATING! THE FLOWERS ARE PRETTY, BUT THEY DO NOT LOOK DELICIOUS, AND I LIKE THINGS THAT ARE DELICIOUS. IF I WANTED SOMETHING PRETTY IN MY GARDEN, I WOULD JUST PAY ROCKMAN TO STAND OUT THERE ALL DAY!

YOUR SOUVENIR MIGHTY CLAN [DANGER]! BEER STEIN IS STILL HERE COLLECTING DUST. WE DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO SEND IT.

HA!

SAM
CHAMPION OF THE EUGLAF DIVISION,
THE MIGHTY CLAN [DANGER]!

[DANGER] ALREADY LEADS LAF, LAF JUST DOESN'T KNOW THAT.

[quote poster=Marshal; 26291; 485707][DANGER] ALREADY LEADS LAF, LAF JUST DOESN'T KNOW THAT. [/quote]

Yes, we do. And we're more than happy about it.

There have been plenty of night of drinking and fighting since the merger happened - sometimes SAM even lets us join in...

Never a disappointing post when reading something about SAM_DANGER :)

[quote poster=SAM_DANGER; 26291; 485703]REQUIEM!

THE EUGLAF DIVISION IS STILL READY AND EAGER TO TAKE ON NEW MEMBERS, AND I AM STILL LEADING IT! SOME OTHERS ON THE COMMITTEE SUGGESTED CLOSING DOWN THIS DIVISION, AS IT HAS BEEN ALMOST A YEAR AND STILL ONLY HAS ONE MEMBER.

I THEN POINTED OUT THAT OUR OTHER FOUR DIVISIONS ALSO HAVE ONLY ONE MEMBER. THIS QUICKLY SQUASHED ANY DEBATE!

DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GARDENING? I PLANTED SUMMER SQUASH MANY MONTHS AGO! THE PLANTS GREW QUITE WELL, BUT HAVE YET TO PRODUCE ANY PRODUCE. THEY HAVE HAD GIGANTIC FLOWERS FOR WELL OVER A MONTH NOW, BUT STILL THERE IS NO SQUASH. THIS IS INFURIATING! THE FLOWERS ARE PRETTY, BUT THEY DO NOT LOOK DELICIOUS, AND I LIKE THINGS THAT ARE DELICIOUS. IF I WANTED SOMETHING PRETTY IN MY GARDEN, I WOULD JUST PAY ROCKMAN TO STAND OUT THERE ALL DAY!

YOUR SOUVENIR MIGHTY CLAN [DANGER]! BEER STEIN IS STILL HERE COLLECTING DUST. WE DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO SEND IT.

HA!

SAM
CHAMPION OF THE EUGLAF DIVISION,
THE MIGHTY CLAN [DANGER]! [/quote]

SAM!
You must pluck one of the flowers and insert into the other flowers as if they are having sex. The bee shortage in america recently is why your squash flowers are not getting pollinated and making squash. But I disgress, it is probably too late in the season now.
See the following links! (the last link really talks about pollinating squash!)I hope this helps you next gardening season!

http://www.vegetablegardener.com/...ion-or-sex-in-your-garden

http://www.nwedible.com/...hybrid-and-gmo-seeds.html

http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/hs398

^weirdo

GALLERI! THAT IS AT THE SAME TIME VERY HELPFUL AND VERY DISTURBING!

SO IF I UNDERSTAND CORRECTLY, WHAT I MUST DO IS CASTRATE MY MALE SQUASH BLOSSOMS, AND THEN MAKE THE FEMALE BLOSSOMS COPULATE WITH THE DISMEMBERED MALE BLOSSOMS.. BY FORCE!

ARE YOU CERTAIN THIS IS LEGAL? AND WHAT IF I MISIDENTIFY THE MALE AND FEMALE BLOSSOMS, AND ACCIDENTALLY FORCE THEM TO DO... OTHER THINGS!? I AM BECOMING EVER MORE CONCERNED. IT WOULD BE VERY DISHEARTENING FOR ME TO WAKE ONE MORNING TO FIND THAT MY GARDEN HAD BEEN DESTROYED BY A DOWNPOUR OF FIRE AND BRIMSTONE! AS MUCH AS I ENJOY EXPLOSIONS, I ALSO ENJOY MY VEGETABLES!

FURTHER CONFUSING ME IS THAT THE LAST ARTICLE YOU REFERENCED SPECIFICALLY MENTIONED ZUCCHINI AND CUCUMBERS AS MEMBERS OF THE SQUASH FAMILY WHICH MAY NEED TO BE FORCIBLY DEFILED IN ORDER TO PRODUCE FRUIT. THAT CONFUSES ME BECAUSE I HAVE CUCUMBERS PLANTED JUST ON THE OTHER SIDE OF MY ZUCCHINI, WHICH ARE PLANTED DIRECTLY NEXT TO MY SUMMER SQUASH! AN ACCIDENTAL FAMILY REUNION! THE ZUCCHINI AND CUCUMBERS ARE QUITE PROLIFIC! DOES THIS MEAN THAT I HAVE BEES WHICH DO NOT CARE FOR SQUASH? IF SO, I WOULD BE QUITE HAPPY EXPLODING THEM ALL AND REPLACING THEM WITH LESS FINICKY WINGED GOURD-DEFILERS!

I JUST WENT AND LOOKED AT MY SQUASH PLANTS. I CAN FIND NO BLOSSOMS WITH THE FEMININE CURVES DESCRIBED IN THE ARTICLE. THEY ALL APPEAR TO BE MALE. PERHAPS I BOUGHT HOMOSEXUAL SQUASH SEEDS? WHY WOULDN'T THEY WARN YOU OF THAT ON THE SEED PACKET? IS THERE A DON'T ASK DON'T TELL POLICY FOR PRODUCE? NOW I WORRY EVEN MORE ABOUT THE FIERY DESTRUCTION OF MY GARDEN.

I HAVE MORE QUESTIONS, BUT THEY WILL HAVE TO WAIT. A GROUP OF ANGRY LOOKING PEOPLE JUST SHOWED UP ON MY FRONT LAWN WITH SIGNS ABOUT HOW MUCH GOD HATES ME AND MY GARDEN. THEY CLAIM I HAVE BROUGHT THIS ON MYSELF BY TOLERATING ABOMINATIONS IN MY BACK YARD. WOE IS ME!

HA!

SAM
DIRECTOR OF HORTICULTURE,
THE MIGHTY CLAN [DANGER]!

Might be a dumb queation, but arent honey bees a must to carry pollen from plant to plant whichthen makes the veggies and just not flowers?

Heh..nvm. i just actually read the rest of the posts. Galli answered it already

yeah we can blame the GMO's Monsanto for the bee loss. :(

Sam... I need to direct you to this also:
http://farmtopreschool.org/...mpanionPlanting_Chart.pdf

GALLERI! I HAVE FOUND MANY COMPANION PLANT WEBSITES, BUT NONE WITH SUCH A CONCISE AND USEFUL CHART. THANK YOU!

ALSO, I AM DEFINITELY GOING TO TRY SOME OF THOSE SLUG AND SNAIL REMEDIES! I WAS HOPING TO FIND SOME EXCRUTIATINGLY PAINFUL METHODS OF EXECUTION FOR MY SLIMY ADVERSARIES, BUT SO FAR HAVE COME UP BLANK. SALT WOULD WORK, AND IS FUN WHEN USED ON MY PATIO, BUT I FEAR IT WOULD HARM MY BELOVED CABBAGES.

PERHAPS I BOUGHT HOMOSEXUAL SQUASH SEEDS? WHY WOULDN'T THEY WARN YOU OF THAT ON THE SEED PACKET? IS THERE A DON'T ASK DON'T TELL POLICY FOR PRODUCE?

i may have just had a miscarriage reading that. i need to know what you sir are smoking and where can i get it

he grows it by himself, why else talking about flowers and bees.

SAM! Please be careful with what you use in the garden! I once used salt to kill the slugs that were invading my strawberry patch..... While I was murdering the slugs, I also murdered all the strawberry plants!
I have since found they that hate coffee grounds! They kept invading the area that I keep my chocolate mint, basil, lemon verbana... I wasn't going to make the same accidental murdering death I gave the strawberries, so I found out coffee grounds! It works!

that kinda thing though you dont need bees for...

bats pollinate more than bees.. true facts:P
speaking of bees:
http://xkcd.com/1259/

ALSO SPEAKING OF BEES
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/...JxDU/s1600/oprah-bees.gif