How to prepare and eat a sloth
If you somehow find yourself in possession of a sloth carcass and want to eat like a tribesman, preparation is simple. The Pirahã singe off the hair, gut the animal, and roast chunks of muscle over a fire. When the meat is thoroughly cooked, they tear off pieces with their hands and eat it plain. For the American palate, however, a little culinary doctoring can go a long way. Everett prefers to tenderize the meat in a pressure cooker for 40 minutes, season it with cilantro, garlic, salt, and chili sauce, and add it to tacos.
"But for the record," Everett explained, "spices may do wonders for the palatability of sloth meat, but they'll do almost nothing to help fill the gaping void that devouring a sloth leaves in your soul."
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